Set Free

I appeared in court today.  I was blessed that a friend of mine from Kisii met me at the police station and stayed with me throughout the day.  It was good to have someone around to offer advice, encouragement and translate at times.  We had to sit through several other cases waiting for our turn.

When it was our turn, I was called to the stand and the judge read the charges aloud, "Said driver ran into the back of a motor vehicle which then knocked down a motorbike with their two passengers who had slight injuries."  I was asked how I was pleading.  I had been advised by several others to just plead guilty to the careless driving offense and I would most likely get fined and be set free.  So I pleaded guilty thinking it would be over.  After my plea, the judge asked the prosecuting police officer to read the facts of the case.  Since the officer had just received the file, he asked for a few minutes to read through it before presenting it to the court.  That meant I had to wait longer while the court continued with other cases. 

Honestly, that is when I started to worry a little bit.  I had prayed about it and I know so many others in Kenya and in America were praying for me, but I started to have doubts.  Those doubts began escalating when I realized that most of the offenders were being sentenced to 30-90 days in prison, and most of the offenders were motorcyclists driving without insurance.  My mind began picturing Kenya Prison life for a mzungu (white man).  It didn't seem like a very good way to spend a couple of months, but then I thought maybe I could begin a prison ministry and witness to the inmates.  Yes my mind went even that far.  It was a test for me to trust in the Lord no matter what the outcome of the case. 

Finally, they brought me back on the stand and the prosecuting officer read the facts of the case.  I was asked if they were true after he finished, and I responded that most of it was true, but there were a few mistakes I wanted to clarify and give a little more detail on the events that happened (in retrospect I should have just kept my mouth shut).  I don't think the judge appreciated my version very much and asked me several times if I was still pleading guilty or not.  I said I was pleading guilty but was asking for leniency since this was the first accident blamed on me in 20 years of driving and my first accident in 8 years in Kenya. 

Then the judge asked a funny question.  He asked me if I felt any remorse for what happened.  I told him that I felt very bad that the other man's vehicle was totaled and for the two that were injured.  Then he asked how would somebody be able to tell that I felt remorse.  I responded that no one can really know what is in someone's heart, but I felt bad that the accident happened.  He didn't leave it there.  He then asked what sentence I could say to let others know that I felt remorse?  Confused, I answered, "I'm Sorry?"  He said, "That is correct."  I don't know if he felt like I wasn't sorry from my story or if he was trying to drive home a point, but it didn't make me feel good.  Was I supposed to apologize to the judge and the court for something I did wrong on the road 4 days before or to the others involved in the accident? 

Anyhow, the verdict was suspended license for a month, sh. 5000 ($60) fine and 90 days in prison.  At least that is what I heard.  As we walked out of the courtroom my friend didn't seem very worried.  He just asked me for the money so he could go pay it in the bank and bring the receipt back to the court.  I asked him about the prison time and he explained that it was only if you default on paying the fine.  Whew!  That was a relief.  Fortunately while we waited for him to pay, a police officer kept watch on my out in the courtyard instead of putting me in with the other criminals.  

Many questions have gone through my mind since that time.  One is why I am fined more and given a long prison sentence for my offense than someone who knowingly drove a motorcyle without insurance.  I guess the reason is because two people were injured in my accident, but mine wasn't anything intentional.  It was just a mistake.

Oh well, I guess I am just trying to justify my actions.  All in all, I praise God that the ordeal is over.  It consumed a lot of time, but not much money.  My insurance is able to cover the damages.  Things could have been much worse, both on Thursday and even today.  God is good and I have learned a few lessons in the process. 

One feeling I can't ditch is that feeling of condemnation and guilt that I felt when the judge was talking to me and asking questions.  It made me realize how blessed we are in Jesus, that he has set us free from all of that by what he did on the cross 2000 years ago.  I would hate to live my life with that feeling or to stand before the judgement seat of God someday and be faced with that for everything I have done wrong. 

Thank you Jesus for setting us free!